Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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