Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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