VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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