: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Duck Duck Cougar?
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
being pregnant is like rehab
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Randomize
