Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
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