On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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