Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
My Sexting was not on an AP level
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
