I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize