check it out our google latitudes are spooning
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
