I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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