he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
