these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
