we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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