I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
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