girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
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