epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
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