I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
