You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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