I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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