i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Randomize
