you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
