i already hear my dad disowning me
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
