Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize