I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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