i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Its about making memories worth repressing
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
We need to get me chipped asap
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
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