So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
