We're facebook friends in real life
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
