dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Randomize
