Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
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