Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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