bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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