brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
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