You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Randomize