he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
