whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
