3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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