Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Randomize
