new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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