So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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