New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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