Who did Billy Mays play for?
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
