I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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