Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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