Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
