I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
