fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
So here I am, sexting at work.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
