I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
