East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Randomize