my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
