Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Randomize