Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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